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5 Ways to Inner Peace
If I asked you if you wanted a million dollars or to experience lasting inner peace, which would you choose? If you would like inner peace, please read on. This article describes the top five ways that helped me change my life. To be honest, I don’t feel inner peace all the time, but I have learned by doing one or all of these five ways in each moment, how to get myself out of discomfort, sadness, anger, unhappiness in seconds.
1) Trust your intuition
Trust that your inner guidance on any subject provides you with the perfect answer. There is a part of you that is connected to the bigger picture, the universe, the source, God, whatever you prefer to call it. I refer to this as your higher self. And this higher self or gut instinct, sixth sense, intuition knows what is in your best interest at all times. Learn to trust this voice unconditionally and you will feel greater peace as you instinctively avoid situations you would rather not experience.
To give an example, imagine you are about to book a vacation and you have an uneasy feeling about the location, accommodation, flight, date or anything else related to the vacation. Don’t ignore this feeling. Your inner radar tells you that the holiday is not aligned to the best outcome for you. Listen carefully to what aspect you feel sensitive about and change it, for example date, destination, accommodation, etc. until everything feels right.
Your intuition gives you guidance in every aspect of your life, be it related to relationships, money, work, health, hobbies, travel, etc. It always works in your favor. To learn to trust your intuition, write down situations where you trust your intuition and the accompanying outcome. Likewise, write down situations in which you chose not to follow your inner guidance and also write down the result. Over time you will soon become aware that following your intuition pays off.
Tip: Sometimes it’s hard to distinguish between your intuition and the voice in your head, your ego or your conscious mind. Your intuition is the first feeling or thought that comes to you, before you turn on your head and start analyzing a situation. Sometimes it only lasts a flash of a second. If you are really not sure whether your intuition or your head is guiding you, take the next step in the process and see how you feel then. For example, if you are considering booking a vacation, do some additional research on the vacation and imagine yourself there. If you still have an uncomfortable feeling or cramping, follow this tutorial and change your plans. This is your intuition talking and it will warn you all the way!
2) Be in charge of your emotions
Contrary to popular belief, your feelings and emotions do not belong to you. You can decide and choose how you want to feel at any moment. Once you understand this, experience it and constantly challenge yourself to feel more positive in every moment, your life will change.
To feel peaceful, try to improve your negative emotions in every moment. Don’t try to change from feeling depressed to the happiest person alive. Take baby steps from feeling low to feeling a little better, then a little more. Consciously choose a happier thought that leads to a happier feeling. Be aware that this choice is in your power.
It is not easy to change negative feelings that you have carried with you for a long time. Start practicing with emotions that you can change more easily. Only you can determine what these situations and feelings are. To give you an example, for me personally driving is a challenge of staying in a calm state. I get very annoyed by cars driving too close to me because I have had several accidents where others collided with my car. Now, whenever someone drives too close to me, I consciously use it as an opportunity to shift my feeling from fear and anger, to a more peaceful feeling.
3) Be authentic
Being authentic means following who you are and what you prefer in each moment. You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone – ever! You are not on this planet to climb to number 10 on the chart of the most popular person, the richest person, the best looking person, or the most intelligent person. You are here to experience life, play with it, have fun, and express who you are – whatever that means to you personally.
We are bombarded with many external messages every day through the media and other people telling us who we should be. These messages give us the impression that without living according to these artificial ideals, we are less than others around us. Most of us subconsciously and consciously follow these messages to some extent and constantly struggle and strive to live up to these images. The pressure to be different from who we really are starts in early childhood. Our school system is designed to rank each of us and put us into boxes. I don’t want to attack the school system. But just be aware of how much pressure is put on us from a young age, telling us we’re not good enough. We are not given much freedom to be who we are, even if it means average or poor grades, not being top notch, not holding up with other kids’ talents.
Being authentic means following your passion, being who you are, and choosing to be you in every moment. No need to be someone else. You don’t have to amass material possessions or force your body into an unnatural shape to ‘be somebody’. You are already everything you are meant to be. And you are perfect in your own unique way. Once you realize this about yourself, you will automatically accept everyone around you as they are. You will notice how judging someone else will become much harder and less natural, because you realize that everyone else has the same right to express themselves as who they are.
I am an introvert and do not easily deal with strangers. I’m definitely not the bubbly outgoing person I watched and envied from afar. I remember a guy who broke up with me because ‘I never said anything’. And for a long time after that, I was very self-conscious about my introverted nature. I thought something was wrong with me, a part of my personality was not developing properly. This continued into my career, I used to cringe when I heard the words ‘let’s do some networking’. Then I realized it’s okay, I’m not weird. I have more features. I listen well and when I speak, I usually have something meaningful to say. The pressure that fell off of me when I made it okay to be me was fantastic.
Free yourself from the belief and pressure that you need to change or be different. Instead, learn more about yourself. Find out what brings passion to your life. Experiment with who you are and once you start being authentic, you will soon gain more courage to continue on this path for the rest of your life.
4) Be in the moment
We spend a lot of time thinking about the past or the future. It seems a challenge to stay in the moment. However, there are so many notable benefits if you choose to be in the moment. Most of your worries about the future turn out to be unfounded. Those who find themselves clinging to the past often focus on the negative. It serves no purpose as the past is the past. You can’t change it. By focusing on being here now, you will automatically radiate the greatest part of worry, anxiety, fear, sadness out of your life.
Being in the moment, truly focusing on what is here right now in front of you makes the world brighter and easier. The colors become more intense. Suddenly things that you felt were important become small and meaningless. You should value the time you spend with your loved ones or the time you spend on your hobbies and passion.
It can take some practice to be in the moment because we are so used to thinking ahead or reminiscing about the past. The easiest technique I’ve come across is to focus on your breathing. Feel your lungs expand and contract with each breath. After about 10 breaths you will feel a change in your perception of your immediate surroundings. You can also focus on soothing noise, such as the wind blowing or soft music. Anything you can actively participate in with your senses brings you into the moment. Living in the moment will enrich your life because you are present right here, right now. You participate in your life instead of watching it from afar like it’s a TV soap opera.
I bring myself into the moment as a form of meditation and relaxation. Or I use the technique if my mind is racing with worry and I can’t stop the negative thoughts running through my head. I just ask myself if I’m okay in this moment, and 99% of the time the answer is ‘yes’.
Tip: If your mind keeps spinning around thoughts and you can’t stop them, just acknowledge them and let them fly. Don’t try to force yourself to stop thinking, it’s impossible. Don’t feel bad if you don’t control the moment in the first place. It can take practice and patience to get there.
5) Love yourself
It may sound cheap to some of you, but loving yourself is the most basic and important step to finding inner peace. If you love yourself, you accept and respect yourself. Everything other people say to you, or how they treat you, becomes irrelevant because you are no longer relying on anyone else’s judgment. You are already in tune with your truth and you recognize that you are perfect the way you are. If you love yourself, you no longer rely on the love of other people to make you feel whole. Your relationships turn a new corner because you feel freed from the pressure of being or doing things to get approval and love from someone else. Instead you can be free to be who you are with the other person. Magically, if you love yourself, it will be much easier for you to love everyone and everything around you. If you have children, self-love will teach them one of the most important things in life that will give them a solid platform to develop themselves on – they will find it perfectly normal to love themselves because they watch you do the same.
Loving yourself may seem selfish or self-centered. However, unless you love yourself first, how can you expect anyone else to love you? If you don’t think you deserve love, why should anyone else?
Tip: Self-love can be trained. All it takes is 5-10 minutes every day. I learned the ‘mirror dialogue’ technique from Dr. Barbara Rose:
Stand in front of a mirror and look yourself in the eye. The eyes are the doors to the soul, so you can communicate with your being. Then think of three observable positive actions you took during the previous day or that day. Say these actions out loud and what quality of you they express. For example, if you held the door open for someone in the store, your statement would be: Today I helped by holding the door open for the person behind me in the store. Maybe you arrived on time for the meeting. So your statement would be: I was responsible and reliable when I arrived on time for the meeting.
Chances are that the first few times you do it you will feel very strange and everything inside you will rebel against it. But stick to it. Do it anyway. This is a technique that will help you speed up your self-love 100 times and more. This is a proven technique that has helped me and many others. Stick to it for at least 6 months. Soon after you start doing this, you will start to feel much better about yourself.
None of these ways to inner peace is a secret. Many authors, coaches, even scientists have written tons of material on these topics; Which shows that something is true about them! From my personal experience I can share that it is a lifelong process to integrate these techniques and make them a part of who you are. But once you start, you will be fascinated by the rapid and encouraging changes you will see in your life. And you’ll soon notice how much more peaceful you feel when situations that would have made your blood boil before, simply make you smile at your progress.
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