We Can All Dance When.We Find Music We Love Sign Dating While Saved: A Christian Woman’s Guide

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Dating While Saved: A Christian Woman’s Guide

Many women want to know, “What is appropriate dating behavior for a A Christian woman? Are there do’s and don’ts for dating while undercover?” If you’re even thinking about it, I want to personally give you a high five and a hug just for asking that question! Your curiosity around this topic simply means you care about two things: your relationship With God and your relationship with your friend.

Unfortunately, not enough women think so. Many believe that being a Christian doesn’t necessarily mean you have to have different standards from the world when it comes to dating. “Why can’t I just go out and have fun?” they say. While there is nothing wrong with having a great time, I truly and wholeheartedly believe that necessary standards for your dating relationship are a must. Why? Because as godly women, everything we do should meet God’s standard. We should always consider where we go, what we do, what we watch and who we mix with.

For example: being in the wrong atmosphere with a man can easily turn things in the wrong direction. If he invites you to see a movie that you know is full of inappropriate scenes and at 10pm, your red flag should go up immediately. For many women this exact scenario resulted in a teary-eyed drive home and a prayer that begins with “God, what have I done?” I am sharing with you today how you can avoid such pitfalls by recognizing what is appropriate and what is not.

Even if you enjoy wholesome movies with that special someone, you might want to watch them during the day, and in an appropriate setting – not alone. Be honest with yourself. If on a day you are supposed to watch a movie you feel really attracted to him, don’t do it. You don’t want to set yourself up for failure. Remember the scripture James 4:7who says “Submit yourselves to God. Stand before Satan and he will flee from you.”

What about romance?

Romance seems to be the bigger question when it comes to dating. Is romance possible? Should we want romantic relationship from guys when we are single? Well, here’s the scoop, ladies.

If you are dating a guy who is naturally romantic; who constantly does the sweetest things to win your affection, make sure his intentions are pure. True, some guys are naturally romantic. You know, the guys who know how to shower their women with lavish gifts, dozens of roses, chocolates, bears, jewelry—I mean, the works. And it’s sweet. But again, make sure his intentions are not to trick you into inappropriate situations. Most guys are smarter than we give them credit for!

And if you are in a moment of vulnerability and he showers you with these beautiful letters of love and affection, you can easily get caught up in that and feel like you owe him something. I urge you not to feel that way. Instead, thank him. Be firm with a standard of purity in your relationship with him, make sure he knows he can gift you all he likes, but don’t stoop to any inappropriate thanks.

The green area:

I like to call the green zone fun and safe places that you should consider for great healthy enjoyment. You don’t have to go to church every Friday night with your partner. There are many places suitable for Christian dating.

Consider a leisurely walk in the park. This is the type setting that makes the conversation easier. There are no disturbances in the surround sound. No chatter between strangers in the background. Only the two of you have a chance to get to know each other better. And you know how we women like to talk!

And if you’re just not the outdoorsy type, consider an indoor activity like indoor golf. Enjoy a cup of coffee or a nice pastry in a cafe. Walk around the mall if you enjoy shopping – that way you can give him some “tips or suggestions” as I like to call them.

There are so many other places that don’t involve drinking, or hanging out in clubs or casinos. Just because you’re older, it doesn’t automatically make everything appropriate or suitable for Christian dating.

The red area:

The color red comes in use for so many reasons and usually they are for warning signs like a stop sign. In this case, the red area are intended for places and situations that you should consider avoiding.

While people think going to dance clubs is harmless, I beg to differ. Having experienced this lifestyle myself, I can tell you firsthand that there is nothing there that can help or improve your relationship. It is full of drinking, smoking, vulgar music and crazy dancing. And really ask yourself that. Why would you want to take your man where women roam?

In fact, many will try to lure him right in your face. For obvious reasons, flag this as red zone status if it ever comes up in conversation. The same goes for bars, casinos and any other place where temptation will follow you out the door.

It’s safe to say that of course, you can have a quiet dinner – even if it’s accompanied by a smooth jazz band. But, remember what your standards are. Better to go straight home than regret your compromise the next morning.

Always maintain the standard of purity and holiness in everything you do – including dating. That way, you will have a clear path to love, without lust taking over.

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